IN HIS QUEST to formally enter the political arena, Al-Wafd Party dissident Ayman Nour, 40, doesn’t take no for an answer.

After the Shura Council’s Political Party Affairs Committee (PPAC) rejected the young member of Parliament’s third proposal to form a new party earlier this year, Nour turned to the courts.

Last month, the Administrative Judicial Court ruled in the first of Nour’s three suits against Shura Council Speaker Safwat El-Sherif, claiming the PPAC (which El-Sherif now heads as the chief of the Shura) had no grounds to deny official recognition to El-Ghad (Tomorrow), the name of the first party Nour sought to form.

The PPAC denied the original application in 2003 on the grounds that El-Ghad “would not make a significant contribution to the nation’s political life” as it offered “nothing already contained in other parties’ platforms.”

No so fast, said the panel of AJC judges, ruling that El-Ghad did, in fact, propose ideas different from those of existing parties. Officially recognizing El-Ghad as a party would, the judges claimed, considerably “enrich the nation’s political life.”

Also last month, the court agreed to consider suits the MP filed after the PPAC’s rejections of his proposals to form parties called Haraket El-Ghad El-Hor (Movement for a Free Tomorrow) and Hizb El-Ghad El-Hor (The Free Tomorrow Party). The same panel of judges is slated to rule on those suits later this month or early next month.

Mohsen Allam/Egypt Today

Who knows: If the PPAC decides it is bound by the judiciary’s rulings, Nour could find himself the leader of three new parties.

Then again, Nour may want to change the names of his parties, because it seems that with the PPAC, tomorrow never comes.

Allah Akbar

YOU CAN COMPLAIN about the cacophony of today’s so-called singers, but what about those who call the faithful to prayer five times a day? Just try it and you’ll get a one-way ticket to hell, it seems.

It’s an attitude Minister of Awqaf Hamdi Zaqzouq is campaigning to change after receiving a spate of complaints from citizens fed up with the lousy voices of many of the capital city’s muezzins and with their poor sense of timing, given that each mosque seems to call the azan at a slightly different time.

Silvia Dogliani/Egypt Today

That’s right, folks: The minister announced last month that he is seriously considering settling on one good, strong voice to do the job though a new system that would see the call to prayer launched at all mosques remotely and simultaneously.

If the plan moves forward, Zaqzouq said, it will be piloted in Cairo, home to 3,000 of the nation’s 90,000 mosques and prayer rooms, before moving to outlying governorates.

“People complain bitterly about the cacophony from loudspeakers in the mosques,” Zaqzouq told the daily Al-Akhbar, explaining that the chorus of whiners had prompted him to look into a system that would ensure the “calm and well-being of the people, especially those looking after the sick or pupils who need to be able to concentrate on their homework.”

The Cairo area network, he said, would see a single call to prayer in the voice of the renowned reciters of azans Sheikh Mohamed Refaat or Mahmoud El-Hossary, God rest their souls.

Should the installation of the network prove too costly, the minister said, another option might be to order all mosques to broadcast Radio Qur’an Karim’s call to prayer.

Mohsen Allam/Egypt Today

And what about the 90,000-plus muezzins we already have? They needn’t worry about unemployment lines, Zaqzouq suggested. Instead, the ministry will send them to re-education camp to learn new skills namely keeping God’s houses on earth clean instead of hiring new help.

At press time, religious conservatives and advocates of free speech alike were still fuming.

Into the lion’s den

SHAABI SINGER SHAAban Abdel Rahim hates Israel and, God forgive us, it appears he’s not alone.

Last month, six Egyptian university students stepped into Shabolla’s shoes but, instead of singing ballads of hate, they took his lyrics into their own hands in a bid to “show sympathy and support for their brothers in Palestine.”

Mohsen Allam/Egypt Today

What did our young champions do? It seems they backpacked from El-Saqra beach in Sheikh Zuweid to El-Zawara, near the Rafah border crossing with Gaza, then onward to El-Barsha before taking a four-day, cross-desert trek to the Israeli border. After snipping their way through the barbed wire the six were surprise, surprise! promptly arrested by Israeli border security troops.

Guess the invisibility spell didn’t work this time around.

Instead of greeting the kids with chilled soft-drinks, the Israelis promptly offered them the cold shoulder, slapping them with a list of charges that could see them locked in prison for the rest of their lives.

Now in Ashkelon prison awaiting trial later this fall, the six stand accused of plotting to kidnap and murder Israeli Defense Forces soldiers. Prosecutors allege the men planned to use captured weapons and uniforms to hijack a tank, then go on a rampage that would include robbing a high-profile Israeli bank before returning to Egypt with their bounty.

The proceeds from the heist, Israeli officials claim, were to be used to finance the students’ other plans for “liberation activities” throughout the Middle East.

Mohsen Allam/Egypt Today Ayman Nour

After looking into the charges on the orders of Foreign Minister Ahmed Abul Gheit, who was busy at the time trying to mend fences between Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat and Prime Minister Ahmed Qurei as well as inking a plan that would see Cairo train Palestinian security officers, Egypt’s consul general in Tel Aviv met with the six detainees. The consul reported the men had no real intention of doing anything bad; instead, he said, they were simply carried away by emotions.

The proof, the consul said, was that the men were carrying only backpacks with clothing and food as well as “small knives for personal use.” Hell, they didn’t even bother packing stones.

At the consul’s urging, the six wrote letters home to their parents. We’re betting they read along these lines: “Don’t worry! Once we’re released, we’ll go free Iraq, then we’ll be home by Eid.”

Under attack

MINISTER OF TRANSportation Essam Sharaf isn’t terribly pleased with is staff these days. After all, he said, they’re hardly suited to play DJs when they have such lousy taste in music.

Mohsen Allam/Egypt Today

Sharaf’s ire was provoked when the daily Al-Akhbar led a noisy campaign last month against the Cairo Metro Authority following a spate of complaints from metro riders. The authority, the newspaper growled, was regularly playing tapes over the underground’s public address system that ridiculed teachers as well as former Egyptian leaders including the great nationalist Saad Zaghloul.

The grumbling minister issued a decree to put an end to what he called a “farce” and ordered his henchmen to bring him the head of whoever allowed the shenanigans to go on. Instead of docking salaries, rumor has it Sharaf’s advisors are urging the minister to sentence the evildoers to a long ride on a third-class train.

Not another NGO

AFEW MONTHS back, we upset fans of the new NGO to protect donkey welfare. We offer our sincere apologies for being unable to comprehend why donkeys should be so well cared for when human beings are going hungry and sick. Anyway, no worries we have a new transportation NGO to make fun of.

Last month, scholar Dr. Mohammed Talha announced the nation’s first NGO for railways. The group’s mission, he says, will be to organize seminars to exchange opinions about railways and encourage researchers and inventors to share their innovations in engineering and services. The NGO is particularly interested in facilitating dialogue between Arab and African railway enthusiasts.

Chins up, third-class riders help just might be on the way.

Sharks of the Nile

NEVER, EVER MESS with the big fish: That’s the simple lesson Mosaad Mohammed El-Gamal, the owner of Cairo’s new Sea Gull floating fish restaurant, learned the hard way last month when the owners of Nileside villas near his new eatery declared war on his humble establishment.

It began simply enough when El-Gamal, who owns Sea Gull restaurants in Alexandria and Marina, figured Cairo had room for another upscale fish place. Little did he know that he was wading into troubled waters.

After winning the approval of former Prime Minister Atef Ebeid and permits from Minister of Land Use and Irrigation Mahmoud Abu Zeid, ex-Minister of Tourism Mamdouh El-Beltagui and ex-Giza Governor Mahmoud Abu El-Leil, El-Gamal promptly sunk LE 20 million into the construction of his new boat.

El-Gamal was hit with complaints from day one as his neighbors in pricey Nileside apartments and villas started complaining that the new restaurant spoiled their view.

Among the grumbling citizens was Mohammed Abu El-Einein and, as Orwell taught us, some are more equal than others: El-Einein’s demands that authorities investigate quickly got results. He is, after all, head of the People’s Assembly’s Housing Committee.

The local building inspectors’ office brought a laundry list of charges against El-Gamal for allegedly polluting the Nile and illegally building on the protected waterfront.

Local officials tapped with overseeing the construction code now claim that while El-Gamal was given permission to build a two-storey restaurant, he actually put up three, prompting the hayy (local district council) to wrap the boat in red tape.

We haven’t seen the building permits, so no comment there. But we wonder: Where were El-Einein and the Maadi hayy a few years back when those illegal artificial islands were being built in the Nile near the Supreme Constitutional Court building?

Tear them all down

ANOTHER GRUMBLING CITIZEN demanding his right to a waterfront view of the sea, this time is also making waves.

A populist agitator filed suit with the Administrative Judicial Court last month demanding the Ministry of Housing issue a decree ordering fences and walls around the North Coast’s vacation villages be torn down. His rationale? They prevent the average citizen from enjoying the beaches, which he claims are public property.

Giving the tiny villages permission to erect fences and walls to keep out the local rabble, he claims, is both unconstitutional and utterly classist.

Sorry, sir, but you have to show your Marina Citizenship Card before you can claim any rights here

Happy visit

IT’S NOT OFTEN that journalists praise ministers of interior, but the eminently reasonable Habib El-Adly is proving a newsreel favorite.

Last month, the minister issued a decree that will see the wire mesh separating prisoners from their families during visits disappear, albeit only for those who are on good behavior. That right, El-Adly said, was usually reserved only for those having private (read: conjugal) visits. The minister explained that the move was part of his ongoing drive to shore up human rights in the nation’s prison system and place more emphasis on rehabilitation.

Too bad some of El-Adly’s officers aren’t as merciful as their boss. Also last month, two young men suffocated while being transferred to custody in Cairo from Marsa Matrouh. The two were among 40 others arrested by Libyan officials on immigration violations and repatriated to Egypt.

The security officers packed the 40-plus prisoners into the back of a transport van that usually handles 15-20 people for a 14-hour daytime desert trip back to Cairo. Packed in like sardines, the men’s constant screams for help and air fell on deaf ears. The doors were only opened at the end of the journey at a Cairo police station. The two dead were discovered as the men tumbled from the van.

A senior officer at the station immediately ordered all the prisoners to hospital, and El-Adly has demanded an investigation, promising the officers will be held to account.

Meanwhile, the National Council for Human Rights has expressed “serious concerns” about the incident. If that’s the best it can do, we have “serious concerns” about the council.

Look listen and learn

AS EL-ADLY WAS launching his investigation, a less high-profile minister was announcing the results of a study of his own sure to warm many a parent’s heart even as it eats into their pocket books.

Last month, Minister of Higher Education Amr Salama signed off on a plan to enroll more students in professional faculties. Under the new system, which could be implemented as early as next year, enrollment in medicine, pharmacy and engineering faculties could climb by as much as 25 percent provided the students shoulder the LE 10,00015,000 cost of tuition each year.

Salama made the move after consistent complaints that competition for the limited seats in professional faculties was so high that students scoring 97 percent on their thanawaya amma were routinely rejected. The new system will accept students with scores 2-5 percentage points lower than the present cutoff, provided they can pay. The state, Salama said, simply doesn’t have the budget to pay for the expansion of seats.

Paying and non-paying students will follow the same curriculum, but paying students will use separate classrooms and a different credit-hour system.

A note to the investment authority: Look, listen and learn.  et